Wiggle your toes
We would come in every morning and ask the same question.
"wiggle your toes, Mr.really-sick-patient-who-is-going-to-die-at-any-second, wiggle your toes for us".
..and we would be happy if he does, feeling that we might have accomplished something.
Playing god, is what we are doing every day.
We decide on how much oxygen they require, we restrict how much fluids they drink, we choose a low salt, low fat, diabetic diet. Basically, they can hardly have anything to eat, drink or breath. Worse, we think they are unstable, so we make sure they don't get out of bed. We call it bed rest.
It is so ironic. Elderly are not better than children. We make sure they can ambulate, swallow and are taking multivitamins.
Mr.really-sick-patient-who-is-going-to-die-at-any-second one day will end up with a tube down his throat to help him breath, another one through his stomach to feed him (literally feed him) and a third one up his bladder to help him pee.
At least, he is alive? at least, his family is happy?
posted by Paul at 4:51 PM
4 Comments:
so dark. is this how doctors see their patients?
11:34 PM
Sometimes I feel what we do is futile. We are not treating the patient but the family who cant take a decision.
Do you know what it means to wake up on a needle stick every morning for lab draws? "Hold your breath sir" and another chest x ray is on its way... Medications that burn your vein through the IV site...
Without trying to look pessimitic, this not an uncommon occurence on the floor.
It is just one side, the dark side, as you put it.
12:25 AM
i do know what it means. i've been there. maybe you're talking about terminal cases. it would definitely get to you. this is the job after all though. there's a certain degree of doubt in any job. i, myself, have cursed doctors out saying that they don't know anything. but in so many cases, my life and the life of my loved ones were saved by doctors. i do believe that you guys matter and make a difference and you should too :)
1:15 AM
Paul,
What you see futile, may not be that futile to people...
A patient of mine was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer when I was an intern. He went to surgery at that time (Whipple).
I got to meet him again in the intensive care unit 2 years later. He was dying.
He had multiple chemotherapies....with contast recurrence. He passed through alot.
Asking him about these 2 years, he said he was grateful to everybody took care of him.
During this 2 years, he got to attend his daughter's graduation, her wedding, and got to see a grandson.
For him, the needle sticks every morning, and all the pain, were a small price he paid for a big gain he got.
For him, we did not act god.
I guess what you wrote was a vent...and I understand it. But it's not at all what we doctors really feel, and view.
Death is part of our life package...a package that, btw, was given to us, without asking us.
What matters, is how you die. How you face challanges in your life, being health, financial...etc.
How, you, or your loved ones, will reflect back on this life, all life, including death...
While you, as all of us, are ought to vent, bear in mind you are the doctor.
I'm sure you'll have better experiences with patients.
11:52 PM
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