I came to realize after 27 years of existence that my biggest fear in life is loneliness.
To begin with we are raised, nurtured by our family, surrounded by our friends. Only to wake up one day, having to face the world alone. In a way, we are primed to be social animals from the minute we open our eyes, from the moment we seek attention. and boom, booby trap.
Worse, what keeps me going on, my fuel, my gas, my O2, is this special bond that I have built with my friends. So many things I do, I see them through their eyes...
We lose friends along the way, only to make new ones.
It is not dependence, no.
It is not aiming to please, no.
It is what makes me one with them. Like one big continuum.
Solitude is the biggest disease of our century, although we strive to be able to communicate better.
Life, alone, has no meaning at all.
posted by Paul at 9:54 PM
4 Comments:
Drowning in my solitude, I tap the well of my being, unlocking my soul into a trance, from which all my creativity stems. Thoughts materialize in my mind, numbing my
body in drunkenness. My solitude is alive, and I feel alive with my solitude. As images of past flash in my head, a tear scratches and tickles my cheek, giving me
both joy and sorrow. Memories are naught but murmurs in the wind, and when it passes, all that is left is my solitude, my companion. I am a lost soul. I seek meaning in a confused world. Unhappy with a
universe that feeds on my soul, thrives on my ignorance, prospers on restricting my freedoms, booms on my simplicity, and blooms on exploiting my kindness, yet seems
to give me no peace of mind, and leaves me not in peace. I am lost and with no refuge, but I seek not to be found.
1:03 AM
you can be lonely in a room full of people yet have companionship when you're all by yourself
but when it hits it's dark and oppressive and terrifying-it can consume you
1:30 AM
there is a big difference between loneliness and solitude.
10:19 AM
That is true, I feel solitude requires more of an active part. Maybe something that you seek, like LC eluded to.
Loneliness is more of an imposed state, passive role. I always think of it as a heavy weight on your back, something that succeeds to bring you down.
11:31 AM
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